You, a Carousel

I’ve had a crush on your mind since the moment I figured how to walk through your doors marked private. I knew we’d get along, we were one and the same. Next to you I could always be both the lady and the tramp.

You had gentle manners and were softly spoken and took me out of my mind, showing me the world in vivid shades and colours like I had never seen it before. I inhaled everything with the greed and thirst of someone who had never walked on the bright side of the road before.

’Focus outwards,’ you told me while caressing my thigh, and I thought of how much I liked you for your strength, your roughness, and your darkness.

Because you came and went in episodes at times of great loneliness in chilly autumn evenings, when my favourite sweater and its lining of boldness couldn’t keep me warm enough – but you came and you went, and came and went again.

Images of us keep flashing through my mind, all madly beautiful sequences. Lattes and limos in square markets of big city centres. Waking up only to dive into daydreams. You, you, you. Day, night, day, night, day, night, August, December, April…

I don’t know where you went this time.

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